I often wonder what it must have been like experiencing the fall of the Berlin wall first-hand. The photographs of ordinary citizens on the wall flinging their hands into the air give me goosebumps; I bet many eye-witnesses would cite the fall of the Berlin wall as the happiest moment of their lives.

How about the rest of us? On their deathbed, what would the average person view as the happiest moment of their life? Here I use the word ‘happy’ to mean ‘joy’, rather than a sense of ataraxia, so I’m asking about moments of ecstasy.

Although this is personality-dependent, surely there are some patterns to people’s peak experiences. Here’s an attempt at classifying them.

One class of peak experiences have to do with achievements. The fall of the Berlin wall was a remarkable achievement; it signified a victory of freedom over totalitarianism – or even the victory of freedom over totalitarianism, for believers in the end of history. Or consider scoring the decisive penalty during the penalty shoot out in a world cup finals.

Heureka moments also fall into the category of achievements. Einstein famously described the following realisation, at the heart of his theory of general relativity, as the happiest thought of his life:

The gravitational field has only a relative existence… Because for an observer freely falling from the roof of a house - at least in his immediate surroundings - there exists no gravitational field.

But unless you’ve dedicated your life to a professional or religions cause, like Einstein, you’re unlikely to mention an achievement as the happiest moment of your life; instead, most people dedicate their lives to relationships¹.

Moments of nearness with loved ones is the most obvious source of happy moments. Typical examples include becoming a parent, getting married or exchanging ‘I love you’s for the first time.

For moments of nearness, there’s usually an element of novelty or rareness. However, you can also experience extraordinarily joyful moments while carrying out an activity for the millionth time, if you’re in a state of flow.

While there are many kinds of flow, we can crudely speak of either mental or physical flow. Mental flow states include painting, reading a good book or having good conversations; in contrast, physical flow states make crucial use of the body, a good example being runner’s high. Cycling or skiing can also put you in a state of physical flow; as can you-know-what².

Finally, the elephant in the room: drugs. Based on the numerous descriptions of LSD trips in books, movies and music, I assume a few people would mention their best trip as the happiest moment in their life; however, I suspect these people would be in the minority of all people ever having tried drugs. Given that two thirds of Europeans don’t try drugs in their lifetime anyway, I wouldn’t count trips as a separate category.

By now, our taxonomy of highs seems relatively complete. Many people would probably mention a personal milestone, a moment with loved ones or a session of flow as the happiest moment in their life, although the details may vary. One Redditer recalled ‘sneaking away from the group at a church camping trip with your best friend and breaking into an abandoned slaughterhouse while pretending you’re ninjas’ as one of his happiest moments – a very specific instance of nearness and physical flow.

Taking stock of my own happiest moments, two-three moments stand out, and they fall within several of the above categories. But of course, this list is subject to modification – I don’t believe in the end of history.